Dating Sites

I've been thinking about the phenomenon of dating sites. If you believe the TV commercials, thousands of people use them successfully and I am glad for them. But to me, the problem with dating sites is that they are dating sites. What do I mean by that?

Let's say, you are in your early 20's and are currently not dating. You try one of those sites and you connect with someone. You go out on a date and the pressure is on. Let's face it, you are trying to impress the other person and vice versa. You are probably not relaxed and so nervous you may not even really hear the other person. There may be more dates or they may not. If not, you move on to the next person and the cycle repeats. And if you are spending good money on the site, you truly want to meet someone.

Now let's say you go to a friend's house and meet someone. You are not there to meet a possible romantic partner and you are not trying so hard. You are relaxed and you see the other person as he/she is and vice versa. Maybe you leave with a positive impression of this person but still not thinking of romance. This can happen in other venues depending on your outside activities or, indeed, in the workplace. You get to know the person and then, if romance blossoms, you know what you are getting into and chances of the relationship working out are better.

Sure, you could still meet someone in one of these situations and think, "Gee, I'd really like to go out with that person" but still there is no real pressure. You decide to let nature take its course. In other words, you have no expectations.

This to me is the better way to meet someone. I know, many people never meet someone this way but it is optimal to the dating sites. And I don't criticize anyone for using these sites but I wonder, how did generations past get along without them?